I forgot how hard this is

 I don't want to make you feel sorry for me. But I do want to be honest about how my journey as a missionary woman goes. We have now been back in Adjumani, our home town in Uganda, for almost a week. Our bags are unpacked, I have re-organized most of the house, and I even started home school up again with Carson this morning. On the outside I look like I'm back in the swing of things, like I've got this switching back and forth between cultures down.

But it's feeling really hard. 

A few years ago a missionary friend introduced me to the idea of heart lag. As we are recovering from jet lag, our hearts are often processing a lot too. Our last month in the States was so full, having all our kids home and lots of fun activities. Suddenly we were packing up our home in South Carolina and taking multiple flights to arrive in Uganda. We had to say some hard goodbyes, especially to our 2 college boys, and switch gears back to the way life goes on this side of the globe.

I've already shared how challenging our homecoming was. No power, no fridge or freezer, layers of dirt, spider webs and dead lizards. We've now gotten past that thanks to my dear Asunta (our house helper) and yet my heart still feels heavy. I always feel tired and just don't feel myself. This is all normal, I keep telling myself. I wish I could be more patient with myself and allow myself the time to adjust. My "world" in Columbia, South Carolina and my "world" in Adjumani, Uganda could not be more different so why do I wonder why I feel so out of whack?

I guess I'm sharing this because I want people to know these transitions aren't easy. There are indeed many joys about coming back to Uganda but the time in between before we find our normal again can be hard. And I'm saying, that's OK. I don't have to be at 100% right now. I can ease in slowly. I have no one but myself pushing me to get it together. 

First few days in Uganda

Carson in the Entebbe airport in Uganda with all our bags minus one.

 Flying out of the States was a lot more challenging than we expected! The day we were supposed to fly out of Atlanta, we drove our van, packed with 12 check on bags and a few carry ons, to the Atlanta airport - through sleet and snow! We barely made it onto our plane only to hear that there were electrical problems with the plane so we needed to de-plane and go to a different gate to board a different aircraft. Less than 30 min later we learned that our flight to Amsterdam was cancelled. I'll spare you all the details but once we were confirmed on a new flight the following day at 4 pm, we caught an uber to find a cheap motel to spend the night. We are so thankful we got a good night's sleep in a real bed, a shower, and breakfast/coffee before attempting our next flight. We made sure to get to the airport in plenty of time and though our flight was delayed, the rest of our trip went smoothly.

Once we reached Uganda we found that only one bag was lost which was pretty impressive with how many times our flight plan changed. And yesterday the airline delivered it to our door! 

My parents made our "homecoming" to Uganda even sweeter by driving to the city to meet us and spend a few days with us.

Having coffee with my Mom

Though jet lag has been harder than usual, we are happy to be here. We are enjoying the warm 80 degree weather, eating fresh mangoes and seeing friends again. The boys have been spending lots of time outside, running barefoot and playing in the dirt.

At our AIM guesthouse

Our plan is to recover a little bit more and make the drive to Adjumani on Friday. We will arrive just in time for a huge celebration on Saturday, the dedication of our new church building. What a fun way to see ALL our special friends all in one day!

Turning the Page - from 2024 to 2025

Around New Years I always like to spend time reflecting on the past year and looking into the New Year, setting some goals and hopes for the months ahead. As I look back at 2024 my heart is overwhelmed with all the many ways God has answered prayers for our family and done some pretty BIG things.

1. Healing Judah from an illness he was born with.

2. Providing free speech evaluation and therapy for Judah during these months stateside.

3. Carson loving school and making great reading progress.

4. Eli getting to walk/graduate for his PhD.

5. Judah finally got his Social Security Number (this was a very very long ordeal!)

6. Isaac and Leah got engaged!

7. Evan transitioned beautifully to college life and his faith is growing like never before.

8. We got to spend so much quality time with both sides of our family.

9. God has provided so many new supporters and one time gifts to boost our support which was gravely needed.

10. God provided savings to do some much needed projects on our house to get it ready for new renters again.

11. God continues to provide college tuition and scholarships for both boys in college.

12. Isaac passed his general written exam for aviation mechanics with flying colors!!!

13. We got to fly Joshua home to America for the month of December for a most special time as a family.

14. Leah, Isaac's fiance was able to come spend Christmas/9 days with us.

Friends, if you haven't paused to recognize all the ways God has answered prayers in your life in 2024, take the time to do it. What an encouragement it is to remember how Faithful our God is!

Reflecting on 2024, the 3 words that described the year for me were:

1. Overwhelmed            2. Letting Go                 3. Answered Prayer

Overwhelmed because it was a really packed year of ministry, visitors, homeschooling Carson, raising a toddler and navigating our oldest son being in college in the States while our 2nd son finished his senior year of high school and prepared to transition to college as well. Letting go because I am a person who loves to be in control and I'm still learning at age 43 that I can't control everything and everyone. So I'm learning to let go of my children as I release them into the world to be independent. I'm learning to let go of situations that I have to say no to or things that I can't do. And then answered prayer because of the long list I shared above.

3 Words I chose to Guide me for 2025:

1. Abiding in Jesus

2. Trusting in Jesus

3. One day at a time

As I've committed this new year to the Lord and thought about what is ahead as we return to Uganda, leaving two of our grown children here in the States, I believe this is how God is going to carry me through. First I need to be abiding in Him - drinking his His Word every day, sitting in His truth and dwelling on it all day, every day. Second, daily letting go, surrendering everything to the Lord and trusting Him to work things out -for my kids, for our ministry, for all the decisions we make on a daily basis. And third, take one day at a time. When I look at everything that is ahead, a month or a few months ahead, it gets very overwhelming. I'm learning that all that is on the calendar won't happen all at once. It's one day at a time and I can only live one day at a time so I'm going to try to focus on the day in front of me, committing each day to the Lord to guide me and give me the strength and wisdom I need for each day. 

As of today, we are 9 days away from flying back to Uganda for a new term on the field. I'll be honest, we haven't packed a single thing so we have a lot to do in these next few days.